So I finished a Master’s degree 20 years ago…yes, 20 years ago.
I don’t mention my education very often, other than sharing my resume for a church or a longer contract, it just does not come up. As I was considering the year we are in it suddenly occurred to me: I graduated 20 years ago. It isn’t something to brag about, I know of plenty of people who have since finished far more formal education than I have, some within that 20 years from start to finish. I don’t try to downplay it either, but it is something that many people do for a very specific set of reasons.
I can recall clearly how much stress was in our household at that time. It isn’t just an individual effort when you have a family, it requires a little extra from everyone. For our household it was also marked by church upheaval, trying to figure out the next permanent role for me, a church running out of finances that meant the end of my position, and just trying to do family life. I remember how impressed I was by my alma mater (you can check them out here) for recognizing my ex-wife and all the spouses attached to seminarian graduates at the grad dinner. She owned it, she knew better than anyone else how much it took out of the spouses to make that framed piece of paper happen.
My original goal was to start into a doctoral program shortly after completing the degree. Instead, life happened. I got busy. Focused on other things. Priorities were shuffled. I hit a period of time where it felt like I missed out on my opportunity, and truthfully, it seemed like I was on a different path than I wanted to be. That thinking easily causes bitterness and a good share of despair, if you don’t do something about it. Combined with other stressful scenarios, it created a rough patch on my story. Eventually, with time and reflection, I realized I was already in the process of taking ownership for this path.
I realized during those years that the cliche was true in my life and work: Leaders are learners.
One of the things that I took from my seminary/college days was the encouragement to keep learning, keep growing, keep sharpening the tools. Not everyone I have encountered since then had the same encouragement. I had people speak into me about the difference between following a pattern and blazing a path, and that was invaluable. I recall one of my professors encouraging me to build a foundation through my time at school, and future schooling if it happened, but make a habit of finding new and different ongoing learning sources as I matured.
“Why do you have so many books?”
“You’re going to another conference?”
I keep feeding, and I don’t just go to the same table every time. Some is an encouragement for the person, some is gives insight to what could be done differently, and some is simply a challenge to what I think I know already. I used to think this was normal behaviour until I started to run into leaders that asked those questions above, and a number who hadn’t cracked a book in quite some time.
There are plenty of reasons we don’t keep learning, no judgement on those moments of tire, stress, or personal struggle. But there is something to be said for the challenge to self and your situation, to put yourself in a place where you will learn, and quite possibly, others could learn from you.
So what? Well, I write this as I am on a trip of learning, reflecting on the 20 years since I got a piece of paper associated with education. Learning from the stories of others, different communities learning from what life and God have put in their midst, learning through conferences and meetings. Find friendship in some places, and sit in the needed discomfort in others. It is a pilgrimage of sorts, remembering that the story continues, and there are many places to be fed. They challenge me as a person, and encourage me to be both a host to others in my learning, and find the humility to be a guest at their table.
Here’s to many years of learning! Not sure what else you should take away from this, if you have read this far, but maybe it is this: We all lead in some way or another. We influence the life and lives around us. We choose ever day whether we will learn and grow in our setting. Keep asking, sharing, learning, and growing.
Eric Friesen 