Did you ask yourself the 3 tough questions I asked earlier? Or do you prefer your current trajectory?
We often choose the current trajectory because it is the one we are on. Not because we have actively chosen it. We may have struggled to achieve at one time, maybe overcame a crisis, and now we are on the set path, whether we like it or not. And sometimes, it is difficult to ask the tough questions because it means upsetting the journey.
2 things I have learned about wrestling with the tough questions came from 2 different wise men at 2 very different and meaningful times in my life:
- People stop taking medication once they feel better. That’s what my doctor told me a long time ago. He spent plenty of time convincing people that ‘feeling better’ was not the final outcome of their set course of prescriptions; it was to actually MAKE them better!
- The best teachers speak from their mistakes. I went for a series of training weeks some years back, and recall the facilitator stating that he was not an expert, or speaking from his success. He was teaching us from what he learned through failure. It spoke directly to my own need for perfection and expertise in my helping others.
Tough questions are tough because they are followed by our wrestling with the responses. Because those responses could change everything. I recently wrote a blog on why every couple entering marriage should spend some time in premarriage coaching. It happens to be the same reason I believe every person, every organization, every leadership team, etc. should spend time working on their relationships and self-perception. We become better by working through the tough questions. This is what I posited to the marriage crowd, and it is what I posit to you:
- We all need to know ourselves in order to better connect with those in our circle.
- We all need to learn from our origin story as we create the next chapter.
- We all need help in learning to communicate.
Wrestle with your questions, but be sure to walk through the answers in community.