I often discuss expectations with people in every setting I find myself. It is one of the unifying factors of humanity: We have expectations and we they are often not met. I see this especially in church settings, where the vast majority of expectations are not expressed, and almost as often, are not met. The best place for people in any relationship is the space to let each other openly know of their expectations.
Even with the great time I had last week delivering a workshop I love, I have expectations that may not be met. And in that moment I must exercise the ability to adjust or adapt those expectations. Just compare my blog about this 2024 trip (click here) compared to the one in 2023 (click here).
So are we ever satisfied?
You may have noticed by now that I follow the good folks at Gallup pretty closely. I definitely appreciate their long-term studies all over the world. They give a number of insights into things we might all be speculating.
An example of this, and this seems to be an ongoing theme on the blog and in my conversations, is how things have changed since the end of the covid-19 lockdowns. There is plenty of discussion around how things were before the pandemic took hold of the world, then there is how we all went through it while it was happening, and of course, how are things with it in the rearview mirror. Opinions abound depending on which coffee shop you go to, in which part of the country, and what day of the week it is. We all have a different view built on different information and feelings, and you guessed it, different expectations of self and others.
For instance, I had a pretty positive view on how the world around me was doing after our first lockdown, way back in the Summer of 2020. Click here to check it out.
That was when we thought it might only last for a few months, at best. And we would talk about people doing their best, having a good attitude, and being a good citizen to one another. That next year, as we can all attest to, attitudes and expectations changed.
So what about the Gallup information? Here we have a couple of interesting graphs on ‘satisfaction’ which seemed to line up with that last blog post I mentioned… (You can click on the images for the full article)
Interesting. Seems to resonate with that super positive post I linked. And it was not the only one. There seemed to be a united attitude of getting therough the ugly back in 2020. On top of that, consider the year that came in 2nd place to 2020 based on people’s idea of satisfaction. 2008. It was the beginning of the last recession. There are all kinds of contributing factors to why this might be. Some talked about gaining understanding through suffering; others about taking stock of what is important when dealing with the unknown; others discussed the opportunity to hit pause on a very busy and chaotic life.
Expectations were challenged and adjusted.
And the drop in satisfaction since then continues. I heard one person share how we are all burnt out from what we went through, but no one is acknowledging the impact. I believe there is much truth to this. When we consider how much time we give to those who have experienced trauma of varying degrees it could be said we have not spread much grace around. There is the expectation of normal, the expectation of getting back to life, the expectation of turning the page and looking for the exciting continuation of the story. But many are not there yet, and just may never be…
- the era of ‘quiet quitting’
- increasing levels of polarization on all civil and social topics
- a mental health crisis that seems to have no end
And the workplace, that key social endeavour so many take part in, struggles to figure out how to, well, work. It does not take an in-depth study to know that the graph below just scratches the surface on how people are doing at work: (Click on the image for more information)
There is something to be said for satisfaction, which has more to do with personal fulfilment than simply looking at a list of external factors, and the expectations we hold.
Maybe everyone needs to take a break, take a breather, just go for a walk and smell the smog. Maybe we need to learn how to be human with one another all over again. Maybe we should all go for a drink and laugh together. Whatever it might be, it sounds like some redefining of what we do together is in order, and that will require some adaptation.
Have you checked out the downloads page recently?
Click on the image to find this little resource I put together a few years ago, all about having some vision for your time:
Eric Friesen 